Bird mess covering you’re decks is an issue for every boat owner even if you leave your boat for a short amount of time. Leave your boat unattended for a couple of months, say and the issue can be even worse with mess everywhere and potentially birds nesting in your rigging. As such most sailors will fit some sort of bird scarer. But these are famously hit and miss in their ability to do the job of actually scaring birds.

This year I mean business – and not that kind of business. I’ve set out to test every type of bird scarer I can get my hands on on the two boats I own and see which ones actually work and which ones don’t.

The above picture was taken after not visiting my boat for just 3 days.

The birds are absolutely filthy beasts. And all this poop on my solar panel rendered it utterly useless for charging anything.

So this year I’m trying out some bird scarers. Seagulls are protected by law in the UK so we can’t harm them in any way. But we can discourage them from landing in unwanted areas by using a variety of tools. I’m going to come back here and add more solutions as I try them or have them recommended to me, so do check back here again soon.

Boat bird scarers tested in the real world

1/ Rubber snake bird scarer

Specifications: Rubbery, looks realistic, about 117cm long

Reasons to buy: cheap, fun, versatile

Reasons to avoid: if you have a nervous disposition this might give you a mild shock on a daily basis.

Some people swear by the snake on a boat technique. In fact multiple snakes on a boat. So this is my starting gambit.

Actually quite good fun choosing this, I have a few others on order, different styles and “breeds”, because one isn’t enough.

If they don’t scare the birds off, it definitely gives me a daily scare the first time I see it on top of the sprayhood.

2/The black crow bird scarer

Specifications: Hard plastic, has multiple holes to run string or a hook through, removable legs

Reasons to buy: cheap, easy to hang, adds character

Reasons to avoid: if you’ve watched Hitchcock, the Birds, you might be a bit reluctant for this

If I was a bird, I’m not sure I’d be fooled by this, but other folks have said a crow works at keeping the gulls off.  Crows are omnivorous, but their diet is 80% meat, so I suppose the younger gulls know to steer clear. Every horror film has a raven or a crow pecking the eyes out of some poor dead animal. so even if the gulls realise it’s not real, they might take it as some sort of portent.

Who knows, but I’ve called this one Cheryl. Because all she wants to do is have some fun.

3/ The possessed swivel headed OWL bird scarer

Specifications: Hard plastic, surface mount, head swivels like something from the exorcist movie.

Reasons to buy: adds character, a talking point, might scare off small children if not the birds

Reasons to avoid: you need a level surface to mount this or the head doesn’t swivel so smoothly.

Anyone who likes wizards and wizard stories will know that owls are complex and intelligent creatures. Not this one though. This one is possessed with the spooky head bobble and swivel that makes you think it’s looking at you, but then its gaze wanders off at the slightest breeze. So, it doesn’t fool me, I don’t know if it’s fooling the gulls either. Apparently good at scaring off pigeons. It’s quite a unit this, it’s the real size of a large own. So make sure you have a suitable place to mount it.

Check back soon for more tried and tested bird scarers